sizzling

Is it just me? Or is it my fate?

Why do I feel so lost? Why is my heart so heavy? Why do I feel so lonely? So angry? Why are my eyes swollen? Why are my eyes wet? Why do I feel so weak? Why do I tremble whenever I think bout it all? WHY?

Why is it I do not feel any appreciation? Why do you have neither initiative nor guilt? Why do you have to lie to me? Why don’t you like to do things with me? Why don’t you ask me out instead since you claim I always ask at the wrong time? Why don’t you save up to go out with me when you do it wholeheartedly when going out with others? Why are you so oblivious that I feel pain whenever you scold me, or criticize me in front of others? Why do you ignore my pleas?

What have I done to deserve to be told by the person I love that he doesn’t really love me after all? What else should I do besides putting a lot of effort to make you happy? What am I doing now, depressed, when I was happily holding you not too long ago? What did I do besides love you?

Why do I feel like slapping, punching, kicking, hugging and kissing you all at the same time? Why am I not good enough for you to put in at least some effort? Why are you so blind that there is someone, right in front of your eyes that really honestly love you? Why is your heart so blind?

I did my very best to make you happy; to be there for you; to be patient for you; to serve you. Haven’t I?

This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 5th, 2006 at 3:30 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.